Stop Waiting to Feel Motivated. Do This Instead (for Women 35+)

Let’s Be Honest…

If you’re sitting around waiting to feel motivated before you start working on your body, your habits, or literally any change you want to make in your life… you might be waiting a while.

That whole “I’ll start when I feel ready” thing? Yeah, it’s a bit of a trap.

This is your loving nudge to stop waiting and start moving — because honestly, you are so much more capable than you think.

So let’s talk about what to do when motivation is missing in action (aka most days), and how you can still take action and get results anyway.

Start With Awareness: Where Are You, Really?

Before anything shifts, you need to know where you’re starting from. Like, actually know. No filters. No sugar-coating.

Let’s say your goal is to feel more confident in your body – maybe you want to lose a bit of weight, have more energy, and finally feel good in your clothes.

Ask yourself:

• How do I feel in my body right now?

• Am I fuelling it well?

• Am I moving enough?

• Am I hiding in oversized jumpers and avoiding mirrors?

Or maybe it’s a relationship goal. You want better communication with your partner, to feel more connected, less snappy, more like a team again.

Ask yourself:

• What’s the current vibe?

• Are you feeling unseen, unheard, stuck in the same arguments on repeat?

• What part are you playing in that pattern?

This isn’t about shaming yourself – it’s about clarity.
Because clarity = power.

You can’t build a bridge if you don’t know where you’re starting from. You don’t have to have it all figured out. You just need to be honest about what’s not working, and what you actually want.

Get Crystal Clear on What You Want (and What You Don’t)

Now comes the juicy part: getting clear on what you actually want — and just as importantly, what you’re done tolerating.

Let’s go back to our examples.

🧍‍♀️ Weight & Confidence

You want to feel confident in your body again. To zip up your jeans without holding your breath and doing a wiggle-dance. To wear the dress and not spend all evening adjusting it or hiding behind your handbag.

But don’t stop there. Ask yourself – why do I want this?

Then ask again. And again. Try it 5 times:

👉 I want to lose weight.
Why?
👉 So I can feel good in my clothes.
Why?
👉 Because when I feel good, I’m more confident.
Why?
👉 Because when I’m confident, I say yes to things and stop hiding.
Why?
👉 Because I want to stop shrinking myself and finally live fully.

Now we’re talking.

Surface-level goals won’t carry you through the tough days. But emotionally-rooted reasons? Those will.

💬 Relationships

Let’s say you want better communication with your partner.

👉 I want us to stop arguing.
Why?
👉 Because I want more peace.
Why?
👉 Because constant stress is draining me.
Why?
👉 Because I don’t feel emotionally safe or connected.
Why?
👉 Because I want to feel loved, supported, and like we’re a team again.

See the shift?

When you know your deep why, your actions align. And when you know what you don’t want anymore — like avoiding mirrors, bottling up your feelings, or second-guessing yourself — it helps you say no to the things that no longer serve you.

This clarity becomes your compass.

Your future self is in the room – let her guide you.

You Don’t Need to Feel Ready. You Just Need to Start

This is huge.

So many women think they need motivation before taking action. But truth is – motivation doesn’t come first. It comes after.

That’s thanks to dopamine – your brain’s little “woohoo!” reward chemical.
But you only get that dopamine after you’ve taken the action.

So the next time you think, “I’m not in the mood,” remember: that’s not a reason — that’s just your brain being lazy.

✨ Action creates momentum.
✨ Momentum builds confidence.
✨ Confidence builds motivation.

Start small: a five-minute walk, one healthy meal, ticking one thing off your list. Build trust in yourself. That’s where the magic starts.

Your Self-Image Is Running the Show

Let’s talk identity.

If deep down you believe you’re someone who always gives up… or “never sticks to anything”… you’ll subconsciously act in ways that prove that to be true.

To change your life, you’ve got to shift your self-image.

Start affirming:

• “I’m becoming a woman who follows through.”

• “I honour my commitments to myself.”

• “I’m someone who takes aligned action.”

It’s not about being perfect. It’s about building a new narrative — one action at a time.

This was a huge one for me. I used to see myself as “the woman who always failed at diets.” But when I started seeing myself as someone who chooses healthy food, who moves her body, and who lives a healthy lifestyle — it changed everything. It became part of who I was, not something I had to force.

Identify What’s Blocking You

Sometimes it’s not a lack of motivation — it’s a block.

Maybe it’s fear of failure.
Maybe it’s, “I’ve tried everything and nothing works.”
Maybe it’s, “Who do you think you are?”

That’s your subconscious talking.
It’s like the director of the film – quietly calling the shots, favouring familiarity over progress.

Start paying attention to how you speak to yourself. Would you say it to your best mate? If not, stop saying it to you.

Your thoughts lead to emotions, and emotions drive your actions.
If you can catch yourself in the gap – between thought and action – you can make a different choice.

That’s your superpower.

Create a Clear Vision and a Simple Plan

Motivation loves clarity.

If you want to feel more driven, get really specific on what you’re aiming for.

• What does the best version of you look and feel like in 6 months?

• What does her daily routine include?

• What does she say no to?

• What does she no longer tolerate?

Let’s say your goal is to lose weight and boost your energy.

Visualise it:

• How do you move?

• What’s your go-to breakfast?

• How do you feel at 3pm?

• What does your evening routine look like?

Then build a simple, sustainable plan around it.

You don’t need to overhaul your life in one go. Just start. Today. Not Monday. Not January. Now.

Because the longer you wait, the louder that voice of doubt becomes.

Final Thoughts

You don’t need to wait for motivation. You need to move.

✨ Start where you are.
✨ Get clear on your why.
✨ Take one small step.
✨ Build proof.
✨ Build trust.
✨ Become the version of yourself you’ve been waiting for.

You’ve got this.

💬 Let me know in the comments: What’s one small step you’re going to take today – no motivation required? I’d love to cheer you on.

🎁 Grab your FREE Midlife Reset Guide  – packed with practical tips to help you feel vibrant and unstoppable again. 

🎥 Want to take it further? Read the following post: “7 Foods Women in Perimenopause Should Eat to Feel Their Best” – filled with easy swaps to balance hormones and boost energy naturally.